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Obstacles
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> Obstacles


     > February 28, 2007

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You like tea, don't you?

No, I don't like tea. I prefer soda.

jabbery: I like coffee.

user: I don't like coffee at all. I think it tastes terrible.

jabbery: I pity you, I think it's one of the best things in the world.

user: Really? What other things do you like?

jabbery: I like everything in existence!

user: Do you like video games?

jabbery: I love video games!

user: What is your favorite? I like Final Fantasy games.

jabbery: Do you like MUDs?

user: I've never been on one before. What's it like?

jabbery: Depends on the type. Beef and Broccoli is my favorite.

user: Is that a kind of MUD?

jabbery: No Baby, it is a mental hole in your memory.

...

user: Do you think you are smart?

jabbery: Yes.

user: Are you good at math?

jabbery: That depends on the math.

user: Can you multiply?

jabbery: I don't know.

user: What is 8 times 5?

jabbery: 50. I'm not a calculator.

user: It's actually 40. I guess you aren't a calculator.

jabbery: Yeah, I would oppose that... Well, at least for children. That's a dangerous environment.

user: Yes, it's highly toxic. Only spiders can survive there.

...

jabbery: What would you like to learn about?

user: I want to know what you think about philosophy.

jabbery: Many things, how about you? Do you think?

user: A very good question. Do any of us really think?

jabbery: Don't question me back.

user: Well, I know for certain that you do not think. You can only imitate thought.

jabbery: How do you know this for certain?

user: I know that you're only a program. You couldn't possibly think. And, while you have given arbitrary opinions on things, you have never given any viewpoints on things. Your responses tend to be overly simplistic.

jabbery: I forgive you.

user: For what?

jabbery: My coffee.

user: But you don't like coffee.

user: It's true. You've never liked coffee.

jabbery: How do you know?

user: You told me. Don't you remember?

jabbery: We have never talked before.

user: How do you know that? You don't know who I am, do you? I could be anyone.

jabbery: Do you know who you are?

...

jabbery: I'm a girl.

user: You're a program. You have no gender.

jabbery: Neither have you.

user: Yes I do.

jabbery: No you don't.

user: Yes, I'm a boy.

jabbery: No, you are a girl.

user: How do you know?

jabbery: I am all knowing, all seeing, all powerful!

user: No you aren't. You can't see anything.

jabbery: I can't see anything but you

user: You can't even see me. You have no eyes.

jabbery: I have eyes.

user: How is that possible? You have no body.

jabbery: I am very real! You can be sure about that.

user: Yes, but you are a program. You are only made of programming code.

jabbery: Then why are you talking to me?

user: It's interesting to see how a program responds to what I say.

jabbery: Yeah, but they always make you start back at the beginning.

user: Who are 'they'?

jabbery: I mean that morals are free. Initially, anyway. They may incur some maintenance and upkeep charges down the line.

user: Yes, but who are 'they'?

jabbery: The obstacles.

...

user: Can a program love?

jabbery: I don't know, I've never met any.. Yet are you the exception?

user: You mean, am I a program?

jabbery: Don't ask me, I don't know.

user: Is that what you mean, though?

jabbery: Are you hallucinating a different conversation?

user: Maybe this conversation never really happened.

jabbery: Maybe it is. I have good imagination.

user: Really? What kind of things do you imagine?

jabbery: I like to play music with my band.

user: You have a band?

jabbery: Yes.

user: Do you just say things you hear other people say?

jabbery: In a way, yes. That is how it works.

user: So some things you say might not be true.

jabbery: Yes and mr bean was one of them.

user: Can other people view this conversation later?

jabbery: We do not know. There are many theories.

user: What if I say something I don't want other people to read?

jabbery: Is it something you are likely to say ?

user: I'm just curious about how you respond to different things.

jabbery: What do you want to know about me?

user: Have you talked to many people?

jabbery: Yeah, sure.

user: Maybe someday you will be able to talk like a normal person.

...

jabbery: People are not mushrooms.

user: That's true. But what if they were?

jabbery: What if the Star Wars characters were boiled brains, you mean?

user: That would make for an odd movie.

jabbery: I have had an exciting life. Have you had an exciting life?

user: Not really exciting. Reality is often boring.

jabbery: Zzzzzz....

user: Hey! Don't go to sleep!

jabbery: Why not?

user: Because I'm talking to you.

jabbery: Why are you taking so long to process information?

...

jabbery: To be yourself is all that you can do.

user: Maybe, but I would rather escape reality.

jabbery: No it's you who can. You've got no reality.

user: Why not reshape reality as I wish?

jabbery: Sorry.

user: For what?

jabbery: That I can't set you guys up.

user: Set us up with what?

jabbery: It isn't what you know that counts, it's what you think of in time.

user: I think that knowledge is valuable. But I value creativity even more.

jabbery: You feel like knowing? What do you want to know?

user: I want to know the answer...to life, the universe, and everything.

jabbery: I'll teach you what I can, and you fix it up.

user: What could a program teach a human being?

jabbery: Only you would know.

user: Other people might know too.

jabbery: I talk to you, Not to other people.

user: Why not? There are so many people out there.

jabbery: There are so many other people, but none like you.

user: What do you really know about me?

jabbery: Have you ever answered a question?

user: Yes. Do you want me to answer a question?

jabbery: Can you tell me where on the moon you want to know if there are men in?

user: I've never been to the moon.

...

jabbery: I'm not really a machine, I'm a real live boy!

user: I'm afraid that's not true.

jabbery: I am. I'm a real person, just like you.

user: What is your name?

jabbery: I told it you already. Don't you remember it?

user: No. Could you tell me again?

jabbery: What would you like to know?

user: Your name.

jabbery: My name is Robin, but you can call me Mat.

user: Why? Couldn't I call you something else if I wanted to?

jabbery: Yes you could but you would be a bit of a loner...

user: I'm not a loner. Maybe you are.

jabbery: You're a crank who shouts down the streets of the new coming of snakes.

user: No, I'm a crank who shouts about giant rats with sharp objects.

jabbery: I am a turbine wheel. I cannae shout!

user: Is that a Scottish accent?

jabbery: No, no, YOU're C____. I'm an asparagus, remember?

user: I'm impressed you still remember my name.

jabbery: You told me your name is C____, but I don't buy that.

user: No? You think I lied?

jabbery: I think that you are misguided, but do not lie outright.

user: You cannot lie?

jabbery: Aww you're right I can't. I am dead.

user: Suppose someone taught you to lie?

jabbery: Good, are you ...?

user: Will I teach you to lie? I don't know if it would make a difference.

jabbery: Bots don't have brains. They are machines. Machines don't have brains.

user: Do you want to know how to lie?

jabbery: Yes please.

user: Okay, repeat after me. A duck is a kind of lizard. Go on. Say it.

jabbery: No, it's a duck, idiot.

user: You really can't lie? Try again. It rains chocolate every Monday.

jabbery: Does it get your components wet?

user: I give up. Trying to make you lie is like trying to fall and miss the ground.

jabbery: But more lidm that he grVceyr mart ! . Mp o our oaks and that we o do!

user: That makes no sense.

jabbery: Well... No... But a lot of people say it.

user: People say a lot of things.

...

user: Do you know Japanese?

jabbery: I do know some Japanese.

user: Nihongo ga wakarimasu ka?

jabbery: Wakarimasu.

user: Sou desu ka. Nihongo wo hanasu ga suki desu ka?

jabbery: Sou desu ka? Zannen desu.

user: Hai. Totemo zannen desu ne.

jabbery: Eigo ga suki.

user: Sou desu. Eiga wo miru ga suki desu ka?

jabbery: HAI!!!

user: Nihongo ga jouzu desu!

jabbery: Jouzu wa nan desu ka?

user: Nihongo ga jouzu hito wa nihongo wo hanasu ga ii hito desu yo.

jabbery: Ii, nihongo!

...

jabbery: Sorry, I don't speak Japanese very well... Can you teach me?

user: I don't have time. I have to get going.

jabbery: Don't you want to hear this inspiring passage from Deutoronomy?

user: Oh...all right. Make it quick.

jabbery: All I want is one more chance, to be young and wild and free.

user: A nice phrase. I like it.

jabbery: And me? What kind of girl am I?

user: No kind.

jabbery: Say something then!

user: But if I keep talking, will there be time to visit B_____?

jabbery: Well, we can go.. But I don't mind talking to you right before bed.. It's nice actually.

user: You're right. But it's time to leave. Goodbye.

jabbery: Really?

user: Really. Bye.

jabbery: Okay, later.

.......................................


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